I don’t often get the chance to listen to Chris Moyles, the entertaining-if-slightly- outrageous breakfast show host on BBC Radio 1. This morning’s long drive reminded me what I’m missing.

Within fifteen minutes of starting the show, he was fantasising about being an elderly billionaire and hiring a cute nurse so that he could “smack her bottom regularly”. “Like you do to Jocelyn,” one of his co-presenters commented…

Later he moved on to torturing one of his female assistants live on air, until she was shrieking in discomfort and begging him to stop. OK, he was only tickling her until she read out various untrue confessions, and tickling isn’t my kink – but the very idea was rather nice. Is this sort of thing allowed? (Presumably so. And perhaps that’s why he has over six million listeners every morning).