Inspecting my girl after a recent scene, I traced my fingers gently (and then not quite so gently) along the raised weal made by a rather high whack of the cane.

She’d been playing with someone who’s an uncannily accurate administrator of severe strokes. “Oh well,” I commented, “even the most experienced players have to be allowed the occasional miss.”

This provoked debate, as you can imagine. I’m personally horrified when I lay the odd stroke astray - a little high, a little low, wrapping a little too far round. But it does happen, from time to time. And, of course, every girl has her own definition of ‘accurate’. Woe betide anyone who stripes Haron’s thighs, for example - whereas one dear friend simply loves to receive cane strokes there.

But what’s an “acceptable” ratio? What’s par for the course? Two inaccurate strokes in six of the best would be well and truly out of order: even one stray strike in a half-dozen would feel a little high.

Here’s the thesis, then… The best we could come up with was the ninety per cent rule. That is: unless you’re playing a scene in which the caning is deliberately (and by agreement) wild, at least nine strokes in ten must be entirely accurate. Any views, from either end of the rod?

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