We finally emerged from the cocoon of our lovely resort this morning, for the first time since we got here 11 days ago. It being New Year’s Eve, and that being officially a big day for Ukrainians, Haron wanted to be taken shopping. We hiked for miles in the blistering midday heat (OK, strolled for ten minutes along the lovely shady path), and found ourselves in a duty free shopping mall, where a girl was indulged to her heart’s content.

More importantly, though, it meant that we were able to finish 2007 with one of best startles of the year, for next to the shopping centre was a most wonderfully-named complex. Its name, helpfully translated on the sign outside?

Correctional Academy of Malaysia

Our imaginations went into overdrive, as you can no doubt imagine. The lack of fences suggested that this was not some high-security institution. No, we decided: this would be a school for girls being given their ‘last chance’ – good girls, from good families, whose behaviour was giving cause for concern.

The regime would be strict, of course. Each morning, at dawn – before the temperature rose too high – the Governor would inspect a parade of all of the students. That day’s newcomers would be brought to the front, to be given their introductory caning: six hard strokes, to deter them from incurring future punishments during their stay.

Miscreants from the previous day would then take their turn, being strapped down over the tressle to receive an appropriate number of strokes for their offences. And woe betide any girl who arrived late for the parade: she’d be directed to join not the girls lined up in their ranks, but the back of the queue of girls to be caned.

Now, why do I have a feeling that Haron might be caught later, having escaped from the Academy…

PS a quick search on the internet on our return revealed the Academy to be a training school for prison officers, but who are we to allow reality to get in the way of fantasy?

PPS in the words of one of our favourite songs, by The Divine Comedy, we’d like to extend our very best wishes for the coming year to “the friends that we’ve known, and those that we now know, and those who we’ve yet to meet” :-)