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I nearly choked on my toast at breakfast this morning. An advert appeared on the TV for Kit Kats; as I drooled at the thought of chocolate, the voiceover proudly announced the brand’s new prize competition: “You could win your dream holiday.”
Really?
I mean, really?
OK. So there’d be the limo to take me to the airport. A school bus would draw up at the terminal at the same time; the twenty or so kinky girls who’d be joining me on vacation would step off, and line up for a uniform inspection.
We’d fly first class, of course. The luxury resort would be perfect: we’d have the run of the place to ourselves. There’d be lessons and spankings and fine dining and spankings. And the hotel maids would have to be on their very best behaviour, lest they too found themselves over my knee.
And all for the price of a chocolate biscuit…
Smudge
January 29th, 2009 at 9:21 am
Can I come? Can I come? Pretty pretty pretty pretty pretty pretty please with a trillion cherries and lots and lots and lots of chocolate sprinkles and whipped cream and anything else your heart desires on top?
Too bad it’s not real. Hmpf. That was good grovelling though, wasn’t it? If it was real I’d get to go, wouldn’t I, cos my grovelling was so good?
Mike Ward
January 29th, 2009 at 10:14 am
You all fly first class!
Seems to me that you are already letting those girls have too much fun. You fly First Class, they fly with a certain well-known budget airline that prides itself on customer disservice. That way they will be so grateful to be anywhere else that they will submit to your authority without question.
Other than that, and the having to buy a Kit Kat in the first place, I think your dream holiday has a lot to commend it. If I had one other suggestion it would be that the trip should be to Malaysia or some other country where the girls could study the natural life of rattan in situ.
Smudge
January 29th, 2009 at 12:15 pm
I’m not coming if I have to fly Peasant Class. No way. But that’s okay. I’m so good at submitting to your authority without question anyway that I can just fly in the nice plane, with you, right? Besides, you’ll need *someone* to torment on the flight, won’t you? I volunteer myself. Out of the goodness of my heart and all that. Kind, aren’t I?
Indy
January 29th, 2009 at 12:50 pm
Smudge, girls who brawl at school must always fly “peasant class.” And this groveling, Your Majesty, is simply undignified. You have Minions to show Abel how to get off your To Be Smited List.
I think I shall have to change my title to Peasant Governess. I’d be willing to top all the time if I could fly across oceans 1st Class…
On second thought, maybe not.
Smudge
January 29th, 2009 at 1:17 pm
I don’t *like* Peasant Class. I’m not doing it. And Abel’s off my smiting list anyhow, he’s redeemed himself. You, on the other hand… disgraceful! I shall have Abel ban you from his imaginary holiday if you’re not nice to me! Ha!
catherine
January 29th, 2009 at 3:12 pm
Actually, I think if Smudge *were* to be invited, she’d have to be put in the cargo hold and restrained like a wild animal. Isn’t that what happens to girls who fight in class, in Abel’s kinky world?
Indy
January 29th, 2009 at 5:26 pm
From Peasant Class to Sedated Canine Class, Catherine? Delightfully evil thinking! If you need it, I have an extra dog crate that would certainly be big enough to fit Smudge…
Irelynn Logeen
January 29th, 2009 at 5:36 pm
Ahem. I realise this site’s spam filter *knows* when I’m being evil. That’s when it eats my comments, you see. But I have been bullied into being evil once again by my lovely fiancee.
Cath, Indy, stop taunting Queen Smudge this very moment, or I shall have to report you to our Spanker in Chief. Of *course* Smudge always flies first class. Always at the front of the plane, too. That way she’s nearest to the exits when she becomes too much of a sanity hazard to be allowed to continue being on the plane. Duh.
Seriously. Where is our very own Wannabee Responsible Adult when you need her?
Smudge
January 29th, 2009 at 5:41 pm
Oi! You were meant to be defending me! First they try to stick me in with the scummy people in the back, then they go a step further and put me in a *cage*! And all you do is say I’m a hazard. Ohhh, this is awful.
And yes. Where *is* our Wannabee Responsible Adult?? Haron, darling, if you want to be responsible on holiday you’ll have to prove it first. Come and protect me. Properly, please, unlike *Irelynn* just did.
Irelynn Logeen
January 29th, 2009 at 5:42 pm
Smudge, darling, let’s settle this for once and for all. Would you care to step outside? Brawling is your thing, after all…
Smudge
January 29th, 2009 at 5:49 pm
Ooooh! Can we have a duel? With ten steps and all that jazz? Ooooh, oooooh, no, can we find some boys and make *them* duel, on our behalf?? Goody! That’ll be fun.
Dibs on Abel! Ha! Go find a boy, darling, and bring him here to fight. Muahahaha.
Irelynn Logeen
January 29th, 2009 at 6:05 pm
Ladies and gentlemen, boys and girls, transsexuals and aliens…
Peace is hereby declared. Smudge & I have settled our dispute. See, we’re still holding that fight. Only I’ll have Brad Pitt as he was in Troy fighting for me, and Smudge has opted for Johnny Depp from Pirates of the Caribbean. And instead of having them defend our honour, we’ll have them parade around, looking menacing. Naked. While we watch. Cause a fight might hurt their perfectly shaped, muscular bodies, and that would be very sad indeed.
Obama, take notes. *This* is how you solve all the world’s problems. Get some hot men, undress them and make them parade around trying to scare each other. Success guaranteed.
eliane
January 29th, 2009 at 6:52 pm
Ooo, I want to come as well. But I don’t need to fly First Class. No, I’m not spoilt. I’m perfectly happy in Business Class!! And, um, do we have to do lessons? Can we not just lie around the pool and read lots of books instead?
Mike Ward
January 30th, 2009 at 1:21 am
Seems like we have learned something from this discussion. If there is one thing that Brawler Smudge fears, it is being forced to fly so-called ‘peasant class’. All thinking tops will have taken note. No one will suggest that she deserves a spanking for her unseemly schoolyard behaviour. It’s a nice long flight on everybody’s favourite ryanscair airline for young Smudge. That will bring her down to earth with a bang.
Abel
January 30th, 2009 at 6:15 am
OMG our readers all have way too much money. Business class? First class?
Abel, who always flies as cheaply as possible (LOL but then uses the money he saves on the nicest hotel possible, to make sure the room’s large enough to have plenty of space to swing one’s arm…)
eliane
January 30th, 2009 at 7:19 am
Abel, there’s no point booking into a lovely hotel room if you died of claustraphobia on the flight TO the lovely hotel room! (OK, I know you can’t die of claustraphobia, but you could be mentally scarred..)