Ever since our move to a bigger house in April, we’ve made a point to keep our spanking implements both tidy and accessible. There are the umbrella stands full of canes, there’s a school trunk stuffed with smaller toys, plus a random box or folder here and there.

I was hauling all these nice things out to receieve a kinky friend the other day, and it felt to me like, from a housekeeping point of view, maybe there’s too much stuff here. The trunk definitely doesn’t close as easily as it should. Still, I thought, we can just about manage with the tidy and accessible thing, as long as we remember to put things away.

Then I went under the bed to retrieve my phone charger – and there, staring at me, was a splintery wine crate full of implements. Which I had no idea was there. So it turns out, we have even more than I thought we did, when I thought we maybe had too many.

I’m scared of opening the closet. I’m scared of looking into the wardrobes. You can bet I’m scared of going down into the cellar.

There might be forgotten spanking toys there.

Waiting.

Vengeful.