Passing time in a bookshop recently – because obviously our house isn’t littered with piles of unread books – I found myself in front of the romantic fiction section. The titles were remarkably racy – so much so that I wondered whether readers would be able to tell whether certain books came from either (a) Mills and Boon, or (b) the store’s Erotica section.
Have a go, and see if you can guess:
1. His Christmas Virgin
2. Kiss It Better
3. Innocent Virgin, Wild Surrender
4. A Talent for Surrender
5. Maharaja’s Mistress
6. Breathless
7. Christmas Guardian
8. The Gift of Shame
9. Captured and Crowned
10. Flogged in the Square
What do you reckon?
The answer: the odd numbers are Mills and Boon, the even ones Erotica (except for the last one, which is entirely made up, but really cries out to be written).
Now the fun part – to imagine the spankings that are no doubt missing from the trashy romances. Take “Captured and Crowned” – the prince strips and whips the beautiful maiden who’d been taken prisoner in the enemy village, and falls in love with her as she writhes to take her flogging oh-so-bravely.
Or the more seasonal titles: in “The Christmas Guardian”, the study curtains are drawn, the lights on the tree glimmer, the gentleman reads his ward’s school report and has no choice but to make her touch her toes for six strokes of the cane in front of the blazing log fire. And as for “His Christmas Virgin” – a kind gift, at first uncooperative until she’d tasted her new owner’s belt, and then meekly compliant? I know it’s a couple of weeks until the holidays, but I’m getting a taste for the forthcoming festive season already…
Mills & Boons are full of spankings and dominant men, I used to read all I could find as a teenager, savouring that one in twenty that delivered!
I think I’m missing an important piece of information… what is Mills & Boons?
@Emma Jane – seems like I missed out! Any recommended titles?
@Em – cheap, populist, trashy romantic fiction