A caning for the waitress

So, the book is out. I’m pretty thrilled, albeit exhausted. Last night we had a launch party, also known as “Twenty people get together in a pub and get sloshed while talking about spanking”. Unfortunately, I was so off my head on dental pain that I completely failed to actually communicate with anyone, but it was lovely to drink in the atmosphere and listen in to the conversations.

Quite a lot of the conversation seemed to turn around spanking the waitress who was serving our table. She was clearly well-intentioned, but incompetent to the degree of almost complete pointlessness. I won’t enumerate the ways in which she managed to make the meal slower than a fine dining experience with an 12-course tasting menu, but even I, with my toothache-frayed attention span got quite annoyed.

When Emma Jane declared that she really wanted to cane the waitress for the general uselessness, I was quite surprised. Thing is, I normally prefer to dispense punishments to people I actually like. (I know, it may come across as somewhat psychotic: the more I like somebody, the harder I want to spank them. Evil.) When somebody annoys me, the last thing I want to do is waste a spanking on them. Emma Jane, though, was adamant that the waitress deserved a caning, and therefore she, Emma, would be the person to do it.

So, what do you say? Should spanking fantasies be squandered on annoying people? Or should they be reserved for people we like? Where do you stand in this debate?

8 thoughts on “A caning for the waitress

  • 2 September, 2011 at 3:09 am
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    Like you, I have to really care about someone to feel any desire to spank them. If I find someone annoying, my impulse is to get the hell away.

    What I’d be tempted to do in the case of the bad waitress is only leave 10% for the tip. That shows ’em. (Remember, I’m American.)

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    • 9 January, 2014 at 2:13 am
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      Having the reminder of the spknniag or caning when sitting down the next day is one of the greatest pleasures for me about being spanked as it brings back all of the wonderful memories. It’s been the same when it’s my hands that have been punished and you get a sharp reminder when you pick up a mug of hot coffee or relief when you pick up an ice cold drink.Because I am not punished that often I still have the soreness for quite a few days if it has been an intense punishment and it is almost sad when the discomfort finally goes.

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  • 2 September, 2011 at 4:55 am
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    I echo Mija’s comment – in reality, I only want to spank people I like.

    I did feel sorry for the over-run staff in the pub. much as there’s no excuse for a 45-minute delay in bringing a jug of water or bottle of wine. But the young lady in question really was extremely cute, and so the thought of spanking her may well have come to mind 😉 And, although I didn’t hear the conversation in question, the thought of watching EJ cane her is just, well, extremely hot…

    I’m going back to the same pub with a work group in October. If she’s our waitress again, I doubt my mind will stay on the business discussion!

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  • 2 September, 2011 at 6:51 am
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    Well – I don’t *know* because I’ve never been in the position of having to decide for real whether to spank someone who’s annoying me, and really I don’t partcularly like spanking people anyway and will only usually spank friends in the absence of any other spanker.

    But, with those caveats, I can imagine a scenario where someone who is annoying (but not terminally so) might be humbled or brought to change their annoying ways by means of a thoroughly good punishment and turn into somoene who is likeable…

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  • 2 September, 2011 at 8:48 am
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    Imagining watching the caning of someone who has been deeply unpleasant or demeaning could be pretty satisfying, a little reverse humiliation to compensate for their bullying of the defenceless so guess it would depend on how much the person had got under my skin.

    LOL think the poor girl got the message as we received the apologies even though we hadn’t actually registered that the food was being served in the equivalent of a 4X800m relay

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  • 2 September, 2011 at 9:23 am
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    Even I was thinking someone needed caning for the poor service in the restaurant. But, I don’t think it would have been the waitress (who was just inexperienced and poorly trained) – probably more the fault of her manager.

    But, thinking about it, canings should be reserved for those who might get some benefit from them,

    And as for Mija’s comment, I was told once that if I really wanted to express my displeasure in a US restaurant, the best thing to do was to leave a 1c tip – that way the wait staff knew that it wasn’t a rude Englishman forgetting to tip, but rather someone who knew EXACTLY what he was doing!

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  • 2 September, 2011 at 10:06 am
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    Makes me think I was too generous – I did actually leave a decent tip, as I did feel a bit sorry for them struggling when they were clearly under-staffed.

    But I would like to cane the waitress!

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  • 2 September, 2011 at 10:39 am
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    @Abel – of the financial kind ? Amusing myself with the thought of the tips you might have offered the owner about the performance of his/her staff

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