PS hope you’re finding some fun reading on the new site – and thank you to those of you who’ve posted kind comments on the stories.

But I’m greatly buoyed by being recognised in Spanking England’s “Best of British” awards, in which The Spanking Writers has just won the “Best British Blog – Non-Commercial” category. It’s so great to receive praise like that; I’m deeply flattered and rather proud.

So, thus far in 2012… I’ve spent quality time with no fewer than eleven lovely, long-standing kinky friends. Emma Jane and I got to have coffee with someone genuinely lovely whom neither of us had met before. I’ve launched my new stories site. And the blog’s won an award. That’s just in the first two days: not a bad start to the kinky year!

Today, I’m delighted to say, the new version of “Abel’s Spanking Stories” has gone live here on the Spanking Writers site. I’ve brought together everything from the old site with all of the other stories I’ve published on the web (or newsgroups) over the years – making nearly fifty stories in all. I’ll also be adding new content on a regular basis: I’ve got over twenty more stories waiting to be published in the coming months. And, of course, it’s still absolutely free.

The site’s also been totally redesigned, thanks to quite wonderful work by Haron. I’m hugely grateful to her for this – and pleased to see our friendship and collaboration continuing strongly and amicably after all of the recent changes in our lives. To her, huge thanks and big hugs.

For the first time, you also have the opportunity to comment on the stories. Kind feedback’s always appreciated!

So, ladies and gentleman, I’m proud to present – to start the 2012 spanking year in style – the brand new version of Abel’s Spanking Stories, which can henceforth be found at www.spankingwriters.com/stories . Enjoy!

…nah, that would be telling. But check back here tomorrow morning for an exciting announcement to start the new spanking year.

In the meantime, enjoy celebrating New Year’s Eve – and best wishes for the year ahead.

Yeah,  sounds about right.

I’m so lucky to be surrounded by such wonderful people. To those who’ve offered too-frequently-needed shoulders to cry on, I owe the most heartfelt thanks: there are folks in my life who have shown themselves to be very, very special indeed.

I hope that 44 will be better: I’m sure that it will be. A birthday can bring a sense of closure: for me, this one perhaps offers a time to stop looking backwards – the end of the beginning, maybe. It offers me the chance to celebrate how fortunate I am in so very many ways; to look forward and to be hopeful; to feel loved and loving; to believe that I still have time for the best to be yet to come. It’s going to be a happy birthday.

Best implements: my wonderful set of six canes from Prysm – so beautifully made, wonderfully balanced, perfect to use

Best spanking story: without a doubt, “The Library” by Casey Morgan – an absolute gem amidst so many highlights in “The Spanking Collection”, the charity anthology I was honoured to co-edit with Haron earlier in the year

Best kinky event: “The Yorkshire School”: an amazing extended roleplay at Easter, involving HH, Emma Jane, Cath and Eliane. (With, here, a very honourable mention to the truly wonderful Fawcett Hall house party: 1811 truly rocked!).

Best music. Nothing even vaguely kink-related here this year, just one amazing album – “The Rip Tide”, by Beirut, the soundtrack to the loneliest week of my life, in Egypt in September.

Best blog post: “It’s only a game”, by Amelia Jane Rutherford: a wonderful, eloquent rebuttal to an email criticising the lovely author (and, by implication, so many other kinky models and bloggers).

Best scene: to adapt from the Oscars – best original sceneplay goes to “Paying off the debt” with Emma Jane and HH. Best adapted sceneplay goes to “The Punishment List” with Kami Robertson.

Best book: without a doubt, “The Night Circus” by Erin Morgenstern. Although “A Lover’s Dictionary”, by David Leviathan, is also hugely special, Neither kinky; both touching on love in original and profound ways.

And, to my mind, the most prestigious award one blogger can give to another:

Best blog: “Not An Odalisque”: wonderfully written, so often exploring topics at the heart of my own scene dilemmas so eloquently and perceptively. Such a clear winner.

2011’s not been the easiest of years, but there have been so many bright spots within it. To this year’s award winners, my congratulations and thanks!

Life’s hard. It’s supposed to be. If we didn’t suffer, we’d never learn anything.

Before Sunset

Ten years ago today, my life changed.

I can remember so clearly walking down the platform at Edinburgh Waverley with the girl I’d just met, falling for her as immediately in real life as I had done online months before. Remember the lovely hotel room in which we stayed: the twin beds (carefully and demurely specified) pushed rather closer together than was perhaps polite. Remember slipping the cigarettes into her bag – one of the pack removed so that the ‘schoolgirl’ couldn’t deny smoking as we played…

Seven years ago today, I married her. In the coming few days, she’ll be coming to sort her belongings from mine in the house – the first time I’ll have seen her in over three months. On Saturday, I have to break the news that she’s left me to someone incredibly close, who’ll be heartbroken.

It’s not going to be an easy few days. I will always cherish the memories of the good times with Haron; always regret what’s happened. Yet, with the love and support of friends, I’m starting to adjust – and she and I are still collaborating amicably on my new stories site, even if we have only spoken once in three months. I may still be dissolving into tears, in private, on a far-too-regular basis – although, seen in the light of others’ troubles, my sadness seems selfish and self-indulgent. There is so much in my life that’s wonderful; I can see this as the start of my new future, too.

I certainly don’t want mutual friends to feel the need to take sides. I’m sure that we’ll be amicable if we’re invited to the same gatherings in future. And I hope she finds happiness and success in her new life.

It’s the little details that are getting to me right now: it’s realising in the middle of presenting on Tuesday that I was wearing my wedding ring and that it was no longer relevant. It’s panicking yesterday when I noticed I wasn’t wearing it – momentarily fearing it lost, then panicking even more when my mind processed the real reason.

I have to try to view this as the start of a new chapter, filled with potential. There is so much that’s good in my life – starting with a lovely scene weekend ahead, set in 1811. I’m truly lucky to have friendship and love in my life. I need to find ways to embrace my new-found freedom, and put what’s happened behind me – quickly, and trying to avoid any lingering bitterness.

But for now, I feel very empty and drained: it’s been such a tough year. And I felt I owed it to readers of what was, for so long, a joint labour of love to let you know what’s happened.

Since she stepped back from writing duties a month ago, I’ve been trying my best to keep you entertained as regularly as I can. I’ve been writing new posts at an average rate of far more than one per day – never mind launching my rather-fun “Spanking Writers Tumblr” site. And I feel somewhat liberated in my writing: it’s been noted that some of my posts have been a little darker, with fantasies sometimes more sexual than in the past. I’m not sure why, but I feel rather less inhibited in some strange way – not that Haron has ever been in the least prudish.

So I could post more regularly. Yet I’m terrified that when writer’s block strikes, or when kinky inspiration heads off on one of its occasional and inevitable short vacations, or if I’m too busy at work, or if I fall ill, I’ll run out of posts. And I certainly don’t want to end up dropping below the “one every other day” ratio I’ve always maintained. The safety net (“Haron, can you cover for me for a post or three?”) is no longer there, and it feels a little like I don’t want to risk too high a wire.

Any thoughts? Is the roughly every two days, with the odd extra post, working OK? And is the blog still worth reading, now it’s also lost its other distinctive aspect – that it was co-written by a husband and wife team? ‘Cos I’m really not sure: much as I’m loving having my own space to post – something, of course, I’ve never previously had – I feel like the blog’s lost a big part of what made it unique.

Oh, and a big and important PS – happy birthday, Haron!