In “The Crime of Punishment” Margaret Wilson describes an episode of public flogging that wouldn’t look out of place in a comedy:
The beadle had his left hand filled with red ochre, through which after every stroke, he drew the lash of his whip, leaving the appearance of a wound upon the skin [of a thief], but in reality not hurting him at all.
This being perceived by the constable, who followed the beadle to see that he did his duty, he (the constable) applied the cane, without any such management or precaution, to the shoulder of the beadle…
The double flogging continued, until a lass of Silver End, pitying the pitiful beadle, joined the procession, and placing herself immediately behind the constable, seized him by the capillary club, and pulling him backward by the same, slapped his face with Amazonian fury…
I could not forbear to inform you how the beadle thrashed the thief, the constable the beadle, and the lady the constable, and how the thief was the only person who suffered nothing.
I think we should play out this scene at a party some time. Bagsy I’ll be the thief!
OK, well if you get to be the thief I want to be the girl at the end whacking the constable round the chops.
What?? No, I’m not usually the one doing the whacking, but the role suits my bossy nature.
Stop looking at me like that!