I adore the twin sites “Overheard in New York” and “Overheard in the Office“. They’re vanilla sites, but a few of the snatched conversations are certainly…. interesting. Here are a few I’ve clipped in recent weeks:
Guy #1: Give me a break. I’ve been here since 6 AM!
Guy #2: Why would you do that to yourself?
Guy #1: Well, I’ve been a very bad boy, and I deserve a spanking. But that’s too expensive here in the city so instead I do this.
(14 August – 469 7th Avenue, New York, New York)Teenage girl #1: Oh my God, I forgot to tell you! I lost my fake ID!
Teenage girl #2: Shit! Your mom’s gonna kill you!
(4 August – G train)Employee #1: Dave*, you’re what, 27? You’re too young to get married. You need to wait until you’re 35 and then marry a 23 year old. Birthing is just “bam! bam! bam!”– brutal on them. So you need to marry young.
Employee #2: So I need to work here for 8 years and marry a girl who is just graduating from here?
Employee #3: Start looking, man. She’s in high school now.
Employee #2: She’d be what, 15? Hey, Jim*, how old are your daughters?
Employee #1: 13 and 15…Shut up!
(14 August – 3800 Victory Parkway, Cincinnati, Ohio)Female co-worker: Yeah, these bruises on my legs? I wish I could say they were from S&M. Actually, I was just drunkenly stumbling around.
(11 August – 33 New Montgomery Street, San Francisco, California)Teacher: You know, now that they are both 18, we can rape them, and it wouldn’t be considered statutory.
(2 August – 2 Stewart Place, Eastchester, New York)Suit #1: I get turned on when the person I’m with is enjoying herself and I’m giving pleasure.
Suit #2: That’s the difference between you and a necrophiliac.
(10 August – Hatsuhana Park restaurant, 46th & Park)Female customer: My sunglasses are broken. One of the screws fell out, and a guy in here yesterday said they would replace them with a new pair.
Woman behind counter: Oh, I remember you. You’re just looking for a screw, right?
Female customer, after entire store stops laughing: Aren’t we all, really?
(2 August – 1051 North Rush Street, Chicago, Illinois)