We don’t allow advertising here on The Spanking Writers, but we thought we’d make an exception today by promoting the wonderful Asli Crafts, at unit G.23 in Kuala Lumpur’s Central Market.

We discovered our new favourite store whilst coming downstairs from the school uniform shop (sadly, too complicated and scary to be a source of useful accessories). There in front of us was what looked like a standard touristy stall – but with a large bucket full of lengths of rattan, of varying thickness, in the doorway. Inside, moreover, were further such containers, in which the rods – a hundred or more - had been cut neatly, one end folded to make an elegant handle.

We worked our way through the selection, picking out the prime pieces, and took them across to the counter. The young lady totted up our purchase – 21 Malaysian Ringgit, or about £3 / $6, for four beautifully made canes. (That’s comparable value even to the implements I bought in Singapore’s hardware stores).

We’d noticed her looking strangely at us as we’d been browsing her stock, and she did look extremely surprised: “What are you going to use them for?”

I thought quickly, understanding that sometimes honesty isn’t always quite the best policy: “We have a shop at home, and the hooks on the end will be great for lifting down bags from the highest shelves.”

“Oh,” she replied, looking astonished. “Here they’re used to punish naughty pupils at school.” With a rueful look, she added: “Our schools are very strict.”

I thought I’d press home the advantage of my obvious innocence in all matters relating to corporal punishment. “Only at school, or do parents use them too?”

“Mainly at school.” She continued: “These days they only punish them when they are very, very bad. They used to punish you for anything, like making too much noise.”

With a friendly smile: “You must have been glad to leave school, then.”

“Very glad.”

We thanked her for her assistance – she’d wrapped the canes extremely neatly for us – and set off on our way, walking around the corner with entirely straight faces until we were out of eye- and ear-shot, and could collapse in a fit of laughter.

Combined with the serving spoon made from sea coconut wood (very, very dense) that we’d purchased earlier in the day, it seems to have been a most successful shopping trip all round. And I’m told by Haron that sleeping on one’s front isn’t that uncomfortable, really…

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