On the tube a while back, The Hunter and I giggled at an oh-so-serious notice next to the emergency handle:
There is a penalty for deliberate misuse
We wondered, of course, what penalty might apply to girls guilty of such wanton misconduct. But then he and I were distracted by the final two words on their own. An evening during which a girl is subjected to ‘deliberate misuse’ by a gentleman (or, possibly, by more than one gentleman)? Yes, that sounds appealing. In fact, one might argue that Transport for London should be prosecuted for incitement…
A couple of days later, I was in a client’s office, and spied another notice that made me giggle:
Unauthorised entry may result in disciplinary action
What sort of disciplinary action, I wondered, thinking of the cute (and very flirtatious) young lady in the team I was working with? And, actually, in certain ruder scenes, might ‘unauthorised entry’ not constitute a very valid form of ‘disciplinary action’ in its own right?
Indeed it would 😉
The last notice reminded me of the 12th chapter of “Joseph Andrews” in which Joseph, after being stripped naked and beaten up by two thieves, is rescued by a stage coach with two passengers, a lady and a lawyer.
“The lawyer made several very pretty jests without departing from his profession. He said if Joseph and the lady were alone, he would be more capable of making a conveyance to her, as his affairs were not fettered with any incumbrance; he’d warrant he soon suffered a recovery by a writ of entry, which was the proper way to create heirs in tail; that, for his own part, he would engage to make so firm a settlement in a coach, that there should be no danger of an ejectment.”